PARTLY FACETIOUS: It's CPEC!

"Dar has urged Japanese investors to invest in Pakistan."
"What's he doing in Japan? I mean, with the budget exercise ongoing back home..."
"He went to attend the annual meeting of a multilateral bank that lends to us at market rates - which incidentally enables the bank to make money if you know what I mean while concessionary lending, defined as performance based lending, is on the decline based on several poor Pakistani indicators..."
"Hey, give a chance to Pakistan Bureau of Statistics, I am sure some of these indicators can be revisited and..."
"Don't be facetious - anyway the point is that foreign direct investment (FDI) increased from 1281 million dollars last year to 1601 million dollars - a rise of 12.4 percent in July-March 2017 in comparison to July-March 2016."
"Right, it's the China Pakistan Economic Corridor (CPEC)..."
"Well, inflows for the entire 2016 from CPEC were 593 million dollars and were around 594 million dollars this year so far so not that much."
"So what gave?"
"Well, last year there was negative inflow from Saudi Arabia of 102 million dollars while this year there has been a positive inflow of 1.7 million dollars - low by all accounts but it's gone from negative to positive..."
"As a citizen, may I ask whether this means the profits from the steel mill in Saudi Arabia owned by Hussain Nawaz have begun to be repatriated and..."
"Nah, the money he sends his dad enters the country as remittance inflow which is tax free..."
"Was the rise in FDI from Japan?"
"Japan's FDI peaked in 2008-09 with 74 million dollars while July-March 2017 it was 33 million dollars and I wonder if we look at repatriation then how much of this is repatriated..."
"So what do you suggest to Dar sahib?"
"Dar sahib only takes instructions from the Prime Minister and no one else, so you would be wasting your breath."
"It's my breath to waste..."
"Go on then."
"I would urge Dar sahib to ask the First Family and his own sons to invest in this country and I bet you just these two families would be able to take our FDI from 1.6 billion dollars to at least 2 billion dollars - a rise of 25 percent..."
"I take strong exception to that statement."
"OK, so add on Zardari sahib's petty cash as well, say another 300 million dollars or so and that would raise our FDI by 44 percent and..."
"That's not what I took exception to; I took exception to your reference to Dar sahib's family being different from the First Family..."
"But they are two families."
"Stop, would Dar ever be the PML-N candidate for prime minister?"
"If Mian sahib is forced to step down and..."
"No, no as a candidate during elections..."
"The heat has gone to your head."
"I rest my case."